[The Void]
Normal Days
2007-07-08
My mornings....I love them.... just the plain run of the mill normal I suppose. Opening up the house, with kittens at my feet. Starting the morning cream of wheat and kiddo happily helping himself to the brown sugar. My oldest asking a billion questions off his newest animal planet show~ I have no idea if ice worms have eyes or how many...
Cats fed and well played with~ sometimes I really must be careful when I decide to wear skirts...and off for the laundry. I love hanging my laundry. The smell, the crispness of the towels...its all just homey to me. I grew up hang drying my laundry, and spent a good amount of years hand washing it as well. After another load taken down, another goes up and if I hesitate too long I will get backed up on it....and cats love to pee in a pile of dirty laundry.
Before I knew it the sun rose high and a quick run to shut out all the light till my house is in utter darkness. I swipe a handful of mints quickly from the front step garden and make the final closure of the front door. If you really don't do well with the heat you ought to try a handful of mints run under cool water and rubbed on the back of your neck. Its so damn refreshing.
I set them in front of the fan to blow the scent high into the livingroom. And start the middle of the day low energy tasks that will plague me until sundown.
I passed the time in the middle heat by looking at webcams in Alaska. There is one placed in my grandmothers village and I love to see what the weather is like up there. Foggy, rainy....beautiful. I look at the other web cams farther up north. The sky is clear and the mountain gleam their snowy tops. I can only imagin what it would be like to climb those rocks....I have climbed many in my younger years. Five finger jack, Mt. Jefferson and half way to Mt. Hood....I kinda backed out after a bit...but hey I was 11. Coffin mountain and Reineer....gosh it was so much fun.
My loves birthday comes soon. And the kids are making him a clay snake all colored with paints. Granted there is more paint on the cardboard than the snake...but they tried and it looks wonderful. A fortress with three bridges for his warhammer skimish games. Made from empty oatmeal containers and liliac stems. I think he will like it. Once its completed of course. I tried to keep my ideas to myself and only helped with the cutting and some of the glueing.
I didn't balance the bills just right for this pay day. And the grocery list will have to wait another week. So no eggs for a cake, and no special surprises this time around. Although, I think I will make a day the week after with a cake and some of our friends to celebrate.
He is about 33, and doesn't really act like it. In some ways, he is the mature one of the bunch. When the kids and I are out playing in mud puddles he ready's some towels while shaking his head and smiling. When the lights go out he is out of bed checking on everything. A bump in the night, or a knock at the door in the evening. Like a protector he is mature, but like a boy he still plays and tries to win my approval. I see it in his smile when he has done something special for me. Like my oldest boy's face when he caught his first snail and wanted me to name him. Thats that face, the look~ and it is precious.
These days, I mean ones like this I want to be a full time house wife. Take care of the two boys, the six kittens and houseplants. Manage the bills and laundry and my garden. Let him worry about the money earning end of it and the repairs...but the bigger side of me would love to have him quit his already part time job just to make me happy. Not too long ago he worked three jobs while I sat home caring for our youngest boy. Then I decided to head back to work less than a year later....then asking him to quit all but one job. Then of course....to quit full time and go part time.
I smiled and said you need more time worshiping me....haha...now I wonder how much I was joking? The way his schedule falls he has ten days off in a row every other week. And those days are spent making me things, taking care of the boys, fixing things for me and getting our future house ready. Did I enslave him? Without even noticing? I thought about it today, while taking out the garbage and recycling. I had told him to clean up the carport last week, and where to put some things. And as I glanced around...they were done. I said I wanted this weekend or that weekend off and I miss the coast....before I knew it he was planning the coast trip. I wanted a new container for the strawberries I was growing with the kids, when I got home from work there they were. Painted and sized accordingly.
Our relationship is funny. In so many ways I have the final decision making process. I would like to say it is mutual...but not really. When it concerns my money I don't really ask if I can buy this or that. When its his money he doesn't ask either~ although does in form me more than I do him. When its a weekend we both have off we tend to just let each other know what we had in mind...and then I notice I have veto power. He seems to want to serve. And I have no idea why but I am not complaining. In our sex life however the roles reverse. And he is a God. I will do anything to please him and he can ask for anything he wants. And he has recently started feeling out these areas of domination. How to give orders, how to be forceful, how to not wait for my approval. How to surprise me, how to drive me to insanity with pleasure. Maybe its another form of serving? But I love it. Its still funny though....how many folks are proper and well trimmed folks out there that help you day to day in a professional manner had strawberry flavored oil spread all over their penis and tied up their wives for a night of pleasure? Sure his muscles are sore and he yawns alot...don't ask why.
There maybe a few areas of my life that are out of whack, and not working like I wished they would. But the majority of my home life, spiritual life and love life....things couldn't be better. I guess I would rather have it this way than the other way around. I just hope friends really can ride roller coasters. And are as strong as they say they are. Life gets bumpy...
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